Leon Kass, respected author, professor and bio-ethicist, puts words to our worst fears in this second excerpt from a three-part series.
Though it's discouraging news, being able to expose the problem is the first step toward finding a solution.
Get yourself into counseling, and while you're at it, do whatever it takes to be friends with an older, stable, married guy.
Be completely transparent with these mentors and with God, and ask for help in moving toward stability. Because part of what makes you so weird with women is the fact that you've got baggage that you're always subconsciously trying to hide.
There was a time during my unmarried years when I griped that the only women who were drawn to me were "old ladies, female relatives and little girls." I wondered what was wrong with all the eligible bachelorettes who were overlooking me. I might have realized that I was trying so hard to get dating right that I just ended up getting it weird.
So what I'm saying is, if you're attracted to a woman and that's the reason you're spending time with her, don't assume that's obvious to her.Then there was the excessive verbal processing of every little step in the relationship — so weird.And there were the countless dates that I managed to ruin by rambling on like I was talking to my therapist.I'm not saying you can't make a move until you've figured out you want to marry her.
I'm just saying you need to evaluate what you know about her and decide whether there's something about her that intrigues you. But if there is, don't just sit on your hands and hope she figures it out.Rogers and Bell has roots dating back to early statehood and has served as general counsel for the Chapman/Mc Farlin interests since 1912. Bell, established a firm foundation of quality, integrity and personalized service to our clients, to the bar and to the community.